When I Talk Ocean, I Talk Love

I came to the beach today

Left my feelings far away

Been a long time since I've seen love

To the water my heart wishes to dove

People say I'm depressed

Never wanted paradise so badly

I run to hug the water below

Knowing it will never reject me

Now I stand here among the waves

Letting my inspiration take place

As I write this, sinking in sand

I close my eyes to peace of mind

I just dried my shorts

From the salty feel of the sea

I still came back, nevertheless

Knowing waves were coming after me

The tips of the waves crash my feet

The rhythm calms, keeps me at bay

The deep dark blue of the depths

Give rise to thoughts as I go further

Maybe love is like an ocean

It overwhelms in dangerous waves

So vast it is so beautiful

Yet scary not knowing what's within

The color of the waves thin out

From dark, to moderate, to none

I guess that's how love grabs you

It softens when it reaches the heart

Maybe love is not always blunt

Asking you to join the disguised

The great unknown, the deeper, the darker

The waves, they make you surrender

The sea and I

We understand each other

The ripples come for me always

Making me feel like I am wanted

Where my feet fails, my morphine is found

It addicts and clings to my soul

The idea isn't far from love

Makes me crave more, but what for?

No matter how wet I get

I always run to the shore

No matter how break I felt

I always come back for more

-i.t

as she wrote this literally while standing on the shore of a beach for a good 30 minutes and came back with sea-smelt, sun-kissed skin and sandy hair

P.S. She felt inspired.

If you had a choice,

Would you choose to feel?

To get your thoughts messed up,

Forcing you to reel?

To thoughts that keep on straying,

Why can't you be chained?

You wouldn't wanna go

To a place beyond your power

Where there are changes

There are expectations

Brain, stop thinking

Heart, don't feel it

The mind is not listening

The soul is not caring

Why should they anyway?

You're the one who holds the blame

Expectations

Expectations

Expectations

Heartbreak

It's inevitable, always happening

They should have understood

But still it's all your fault

Why didn't you scream louder?

"To not expect from is to love for"

You would say

But the wheel keeps on turning

Not giving a damn on what you say

Even the wheel refuses to feel

Calmly rising above everything

- - -

Trust no promise

Fear no liar

Embrace your tears

I refuse to feel

-i.t

Alter Ego

"she's a madhouse"

one may say

"she's so weird"

one would portray

"she's so loud"

that's all she could hear

"she's an enigma"

well, yeah, that's okay

she thinks she's ridiculous

at times she over-wondered

some could think of her as marvelous

how can that be? she pondered

she thinks she's not divine

how could anyone say she is?

her insecurities got her entwined

haphazard is how her psyche is

so ungrateful that she was

her mouth spoke of distaste

all those gazes, all those stares

by God oh how she can't bear!

as her alter ego

I'm willing to speak through

so let me tell you

the utmost of truths:

what she feels

how she bears

what she hopes

how she expects

she's gone and away now

so this I can reveal

everything slips into her nerves now

maybe "everything" includes you

she can't drown her demons

they could really swim

reality coexists with fantasies

she no longer wants to dream

she's pretty much scared

ghosts keep her up at night

"this is a play," that's all they say

only her faith held on so tight

in the corner, she overflows tears

no, one would prolly not believe

"am I really loved, or is this just a game?"

how that echoed in her mind of grief

-i.t